A bit of a laugh

January is apparently the most depressing month of the year so I thought I'd give you all a good laugh tonight. I actually cried from laughter reading some of these!

FUNNY CHURCH BULLETIN ERRORS

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.


Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.


Thursday at 5:00 pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.


The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 p.m. Please use the back door.

The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."


Weight Watchers will meet at 7 pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.


Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.



The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6 PM. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.

 The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."



The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.


The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.


The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.


The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.


During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.



Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."


The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

 22 members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why.



Hymn 43: "Great God, what do I see here?"
Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett
Hymn 47: "Hark! an awful voice is sounding"


The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.


Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.


Miss Charlene Mason sang "I Will Not Pass This Way Again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.


The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."


Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.



The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility.


This evening at 7 pm there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.



The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir